Just Perfect

these words struck me when i was at the laundromat the other day with my ipod on blast:

Oh God grant me the serenity to accept the things that I cannot change
The courage to change the things that I can
The wisdom to know the difference
... and God give me the courage to love with an open heart,
An open heart, an open heart I wanna love with an open heart
... with an open heart

"Intro: Loving" - India Arie

mental mush

no vivid prose today, just random thoughts:

• im so over my physiology class .... and i still cant find that final push to actually study.
• i am sad. but i will be ok.
• i thought i had made progress, but now i dont feel so strong anymore - like there is some void all of a sudden.
• you were my rock where i placed my hand.
• i wonder if i had given enough for you to return back to me.
• no one has ever been able to reach me like you.
• have u ever felt like the advice your friends give you feels wrong?
• i wonder if you will find yourself back with me. i think that is what makes me the most uncertain, and indirectly the saddest ... i just dont know. i know that we always come back together - whether one person ends it and when we least expect it.
• but today i am sad ... i wanna help ... i wish i could help ... be there for you like you did for me, but you and i both know that's not what you need right now.
• maybe i was the one who deals with things in the most efficient way possible that it wore you down.
• deep down, ive always wanted you near.

"and that's the way this wheel keeps working out ... " - john mayer